Like a snake, she slithers her way to me.
And with her eyes as wide as saucers, she falls down to her knees.
Time seems to slow down, and people seem to freeze.
The darkest soul in the room gasps aloud and says, “save me please.”
And as I watch her breathe for the last bits of air, I watch her begin to bleed.
Her wrists begin to ooze red and I watch her life escape the vessel that is her body.
Tears form in the pockets of her eyes, and with a broken voice, she says “I just needed somebody.”
Her body begins to fall to the side & I watch her with surprise.
She whispers a word that sent shivers down my spine, her eyes flutter and all she could mutter was “goodbye.”


Tongue out and eyes wide.
She got me all sorts of hypnotized.
Got men saying all sorts of prayers.
She’s about to make me lose air.
I can feel her blue eyes pierce my very soul from all the way across the room.
I could almost feel my impending doom.
Everyone knows she’s the darkest soul that’s tucked in a mini black dress.
& she has me in all sorts of distress.
But, look at the way she licks her lips.
How can you tell me to fucking resist?
She’s as dark as death but shines brighter than any light.
She’s the protagonist of every man’s dream while they sleep at night.
And with a drink in my hand, I slowly fall in love with the beauty on the dance floor, & I succumb.
Because just like any other drug, the darkest soul in the room entered my body and made me feel so damn numb.


You act like you love her, and you swear that you need her.
But darling, you just need someone to make you sweat out your fever.
Did you tell her you loved her from the moment you laid eyes on her?
Or are you gonna tell me it was all a blur?
You know, I don’t seem to understand.
Less than a year ago, you said your life without me would be so fucking bland.
But yet, you’re in the arms of another girl telling her the same.
Don’t you think your tricks are getting a little lame? 
Maybe you do love her, or perhaps you never will.
Because what you want, is the goddamn thrill.
So keep telling her she’s all you’ve ever wanted.
For your love will one day become sour and rotten.
And when it does, you’ll be just fine.
Because next summer, you’ll look at some girl you’ve met online for the thirteenth time, and say “honey, will you be mine?”


I just feel like crawling into a ball and disappearing from the face of the earth.
Time just keeps ticking but I feel like I haven’t gone anywhere.
I’m scared that maybe I’ll live this life forever.
I’m scared that maybe I won’t make it.
I’m scared that maybe time will keep ticking and I’ll be hidden in between time itself, hoping for the day I’d break off from its chains.
I need to find a way out, I just need to know how.


We’re hidden in the dark, covering our mouths so no one could hear the sounds of our breathing.
Footsteps are heard approaching.
Someone knocks on the door.
We burst out in laughter and run up the stairs to the roof of this building.
I don’t think I’ve ever felt so alive as I held someone’s hand.
I didn’t care about where we were going or how we got there, as long as I got there with you.
Interrupting my thoughts, you yelled “God, this is fucking amazing!”
I think I was blue in the face of how much I laughed as I ran.
And as we finally reached the roof top, the door slammed right behind us.
As you walked ahead, you whispered “look.”
Right in front of us was the dark night sky, it was so beautiful.
Stars were laid out in front of us, we had front row tickets to the Earth’s art gala.
You stood there and tears formed in your eyes.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen you cry.
But, you turned to me and said “why do you do this?”
I simply answered “I’d do anything, as long as it’s with you.”
You looked at me & said “I love –”
The door behind us begins to rattle and the police shouting becomes clear as day.
We ran as fast as we could to hide, but it seemed like there was no where else to go.
Before we knew it, the door swung open and there we were, surrendered.
You took my hand and said ” I don’t care what happens right now, I just need you to know that I love you.”
I begin to tear up, knowing that’s the last of you I’ll see.
I couldn’t breath, was this really happening?
And in the blink of an eye, they took you away from me.
My heart was ripped out from its very seams.
And as I was left alone on that rooftop, I sobbed for hours on end.
And years later, I still sob for hours on end.
Because it was you, who raised my blood pressure to dangerous levels, knowing that I’d love the feeling.
It was you who guarded me from the bad and kept me safe from it all.
And without you, I feel so empty.
But as I lay out here on the porch of my house, I look at the sky, the very one we saw 20 years ago, and I wonder if maybe you’re tearing up and asking “why’d she do it?”
With a smile on my face, and tears welling up in my eyes, I whisper “I’d do anything, as long as it’s with you.”

Quarter to nine

It was a quarter to nine.
& she was laying right by my side.
She exhaled as loud as ever and held my hand as tightly as she could.
She desperately needed me to hold her like no else would.
She whispered in my ear and said “look at me.”
“Look at me, please.”
It was too dark to see but I knew she needed to feel my stare pierce her soul.
But little did she know that I wanted to sprint out of that bedroom door.
Because it was a quarter to nine.
& I didn’t want her to be mine.
She wasn’t the one and she knew it very well.
But she reminded me of myself when I loved the owner of the most beautiful hell.
She needed me to love her with everything I had.
But both her & I knew that I was nothing but bad.
But when she gave up & said goodnight tears formed in my eyes.
Because all I could remember was the time I laid with the devil herself, and heard her say “goodbye.”


The darkness gives me hugs that my mother would never dare give me.
It holds me tight and succumbs me to it.
It tells me I’ll be okay, to embrace and love it with every inch of my soul.
It whispers in my ears, and tells me “you’re beautiful, I love you.”
It brings temporary peace into my heart, a remedy that only lasts for a couple minutes.
But I want more, so give me more.
Hug me tighter, please.
It laughs out loud and says “oh please you really think I’m good for you?”
It enters my soul and makes me feel emotions that one can’t possibly think of.
Anger. Sadness. Loneliness.
Who am I now?
Why am I bleeding?
Oh God, where are you?
I suffocate and I can’t breath.
The darkness enveloped itself in me and destroyed me from within.
It ravages my soul and feasts like a famished lion who has finally caught his prey for the day.
As it eats me from within, I squint and see the light just a few inches away from me.
I gasp and I gasp with the little piece of myself in me.
And I reach, but it only seems to get farther from me.
It starts to flicker and slowly the light buzzes out.
And there I am, in chains and my eyes as black as the night sky.
I can’t move, and I don’t think I ever will.
But with my soul no longer belonging to me, I smile to the overwhelming darkness & say “you’re beautiful, I love you.”