#14

imageI should’ve never allowed you to speak.
I should’ve walked away from the moment you held my hand.
I don’t know why I let you continue the tricks you wanted to play with my mind.
Continuous heartbreaks left me dead inside, left my heart shriveled up inside my chest.
So how come whenever I saw you, I’d feel a faint beat emit from within me?
I should’ve screamed words that punctured your heart when you uttered the words that punctured mine.
I should’ve sent you to hell, but instead I’d pray to the Lord in the heavens, asking for your return.
But I guess he’s been busy because you still haven’t come back.
You said you’d always be here.
So, where are you?
Did you get lost on the way back to me?
How could I have given you everything for just a small percentage of you?
I gave you my body, my soul and even though it was covered in scars and wounds, I gave you my heart.
But instead you’d play with it and you’d grab the biggest knife you had in your possession and cut it to pieces.
But, never once did I ever feel the pain, because for each puncture on my heart was a kiss to my lips.
Blissful ignorance.
And once my heart had bled through its capacity, you handed it back to me and simply said “I’m sorry”
And like a movie, I couldn’t stop hitting the rewind and fast forward button over and over again in my head.
I rewinded to the very moment you laid on top of me in your bed and said “I think I love you”, and I fast forwarded to the very moment you said you couldn’t do it.
What do you mean you couldn’t do it?
Was loving me a hectic 9 to 5 that had you ripping your hairs out at the end of the day?
Or was it all a facade you played to fill that void in your chest that you call your heart?
You claimed to say you’re sorry, but you got to walk away with your live and beating heart all cozied up in between your chest, while I had mine in the palm of my hands.
It was torn up with wounds all around it, and on the very middle was a lip stain the color of the lipstick you always loved to wear.
A lip stain in the shade of red.
And as you began to get smaller and smaller the more you walked away from me, I stared at that lip stain blazed in red, and watched my heart let out its one last beat before it died in the very palm of my hands.

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