sometimes I sit in the dark corners of my room and wonder what my life would’ve been like if you were still here.
would I have loved you even more?
or would I realize that I only loved you when you weren’t around?
would the inhalation of your aroma continue to arouse my mind?
or would I become revolted of how many times I’ve inhaled you?
I wish I had the chance to answer those simple questions, but instead you left me with my heart dangling by a thread.
If you’re quiet enough, you can hear my heart screaming.
sometimes, it screams for days.
the sound is so deafening, so sad.
I try to cover my ears but you could still feel my heart pounding its way out my chest to you.
But it never seems to find you.
why is there a need to find you when I already had you?
why does my heart so desperately need you when it once had you?
I guess the answers to my questions will never be known.
but if you were still here, these questions wouldn’t have existed.
But maybe you never did too.